Temperature Adjustments: A Matter of Life and Death
As the world teeters on the brink of chaos, we've been forced to introduce a new system of emergency temperature adjustments. It's time to get real about the weather.
Current Temperature: -100°F
We're experiencing an unexpected cold snap. Our team of expert weather scientists (a group of highly caffeinated, yet sleep-deprived geniuses) have declared a state of emergency.
Adjusted Temperature: 100°F
Thanks to our patented Temperature Hacks, we've managed to flip the switch and turn the temperature up to a sweltering 100°F. Don't get too comfortable, though - this is just an emergency adjustment.